I will my self to stumble and fall until I stand in clarity.

The contrast between my life and the life of a person as described to me in a recent letter of what life is like in Japan, at the moment, is a glaring contrast. I suppose the letter , within the established system would make one thankful for what one has, but if I look at how I exist as my mind, the things that occupy the being of my self here, then I am disgusted with my self. Yet, being disgusted, is another “being” of my self here. There really is only my self stopping the fear and the desire, and the thoughts and the ideas and the beliefs, and the pride, and the self pity and the back chat that is the mind. The only thing there is, is stopping the fear and the anxiety. Is standing up as myself, not as being in a battle with my self, but being the “will” of my self, here, and forgiving all that is my mind and my feelings and emotions, with calm directed breathing certainty as my self. Even moving as analysis, as thought I need to analyze every moment, because I have been led to believe that analysis, as an action, means that I am doing something in an intelligent way is an illusion. If I stand, in certainty, in clarity, which is my self accepting my self, the self that is awareness, awareness already knowing all that is here, then analysis is merely another action that is what the mind believes significant.
Analysis is not really necessary, the picking apart of something, self does not need to “pick apart” self can stand and forgive in clarity because self is awareness of life as all as one as equal as what is best for all.
In “analysis” one is judgement, one uses comparison, one contrasts, one is wanting, one is needing, one is desiring.

I forgive myself for allowing and accepting my self to not want to play the game of the mind, and in not wanting to play the game of the mind I become fearful of the consequence of not participating, for fear that my father will not love me.
I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to become angry that I have been punished for not wanting to play the game, for being forced to play the game that is the mind that is a constant analysis of how the mind exist, where discovering the contrasts gives one a “high” feeling.
I forgive my self for allowing and accepting my self to exist as the mind
I forgive myself for allowing and accepting my self to allow my self to consume the desire of hiding in the arms of a man from the game of survival instead of standing up here as my self as all as one as equal, without fear in the realization that I am here, that I am able to direct my self in breath.
I forgive myself for allowing and accepting my self to hide from what is here because I am afraid of what I might feel.
I forgive myself for allowing and accepting my self to fear what it is that I feel.
I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to hold my self in for fear of what it is I might feel,that I might feel pain.
I forgive myself for allowing and accepting my self to fear the consequence of feeling pain should I not join in and play the game of the mind.
I forgive myself for allowing and accepting my self to hold my self in in the fear that I might feel and react against the playing of the game that is the mind consciousness system
I forgive myself for allowing and accepting my self to not look as my self in clarity because then I would stand and in standing I would then be punished, rejected, denied.
I forgive myself for allowing and accepting my self to fear standing as my self.
I forgive myself for allowing and accepting my self to fear the punishment I will physically receive should I not follow the rules of morality.
I forgive myself for allowing and accepting my self to fear losing sex should I not create the proper facade, become the proper superficial presentation of my self as dictated by the mind consciousness system
I forgive myself for allowing and accepting my self to believe that not becoming the super “face” that which is superimposed on the physical as illusion as what I believe exists, as I must accept as what is real, is the only way that does not create pain in this existence.
I forgive myself for allowing and accepting mys elf to fear being my self, which is fearing clarity and constancy, that which is what is real.
I forgive myself for allowing and accepting my self to fear the power of my self, to fear the power of my self as life to stand for fear of rejection, of attack, of punishment.
I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to fear attack, which is my self fearing speaking, acting, moving thought judgement.
I forgive myself for allowing and accepting my self to believe that I can be rejected, that I can be punished, that I can be lost, that the standing of my self as life can be painful, not realizing that all of this is merely an idea that is my mind that is fear.
I am here
I am life
I will my self to stumble and fall until I stand in clarity, until I speak as my self as life as all as one as equal.
IN every stumble, in every fall, I am directed as my self as the principle of all as one as equal.
I stand up until it is done, until I no longer fear, until the illusion of fear is not the illumination of my self.

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About rebeccakarlendalmas

Desteni I Process Equal Life Foundation livingincome.me eqafe.com
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