Balancing to remain life, to remain vulnerable, to remain here

to not judge.

I have been irritated with someone in my life in the way they interact with me, and I have not displayed this reaction within my self because I have, in the moment breathed and said to my self how do I keep this moving in a productive way, but realize that the irritation I felt remains and has built to some degree. It sits within me and is something I have to take a closer look at.

But also, I take the same method, this method of what is productive, what is what is best for all, what is best for allowing things to move and function, just as I do with the people I direct within my cooperative, this that I do not always apply to my self and my interactions with everything around me.

When I breath and remain in this desire to “let things go” and realize moving from a perspective of what “keeps the movement going”, the movement being what allows things to function, I find I stop the stream, or weight running down my back. But even as I write these words, there is a lot of movement in my back, as though, in some fear, I am “freezing” here. I don’t want to get stuck in the “knowing” thing; this that is not movement because it is a “thing” an idea, a desire based on the way the mind works, where I collect a badge that moves me up the ladder on the pyramid of….bullshit, the pyramid of more than and less than, where I stop my self as life and stop the movement, stop the direction of my self, where I no longer experience the expression of another and instead qualify that expression as something not of me, something that is going to move that “other” above me on the ladder, when, if I take what is expressed around me and allow it to move, allow my self to see it as movement, just as I choose to direct what is here that I deal with to keep it moving, i can actually experience what I am wanting to judge, for illusive gain, as movement, as life, as my self as life.

So, in being pure direction, so to speak, with “moving through” what might be perceived as “problems” from the perspective of right and wrong, and doing the same when hearing the words of another that my mind wants to use to judge my self as lacking, when that “lack” is non existent because any and all expressions are my self, are life moving and directing itself, where I, in allowing the perceptive expression of another be me, where I can experience the perception/expression as my self and therefor REJOICE in this movement as it is life, it is here, I am one and equal to it.

From this I direct my self through my daily interactions with plant and animal, and planet, and with the words of others, the presentation of others and my self as all as one as equal, in breath and actually begin to be able to laugh with and as the movement of life.

And what is really weird, at at this moment is that I just had a memory of actually doing this, of sitting here writing this many years ago! Breath and let whatever trick of the mind that is go!

All “constriction” is fear, is not allowing self to MOVE as life, therefor all judgement is a perceived, as the mind, attack or threat. Reaction is the mind, the allowance of energy to limit the movement and direction that is what life is, that is what self is.

To balance all this, to remain here, to remain vulnerable, to “let the mind, the judge, go” so that I may, perhaps for the first time SMILE as life as all as one as equal.


About rebeccakarlendalmas

Desteni I Process Equal Life Foundation
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