I went up to Boston again. In standing before the university where I rehearse, in suddenly being surrounded by lots of people moving about along the street, with the trains and buses, I noticed so much movement in my self, that swirling “fear” moving as me, that which can take over. Looking at all the people around me, I realize that so many of them are probably the same. All these people moving as this, so locked into this that they can see nothing else.
If the stress that comes with the present money/survival system were absent, then so much of what drives and moves the human in non-awareness of what is happening on the earth would stop.
The job my husband was doing was remodeling/rebuilding the Zurich airport. He would complain that he could not get anything done because none of the various entities that specialized in the different facets of constructing a building were making any commitment to scheduling.
What was happening was that in order to make money, the electricians, for example, wanted to have a schedule of the building phases so they could come in and do their work in one defined period. If they had to move their work schedule around in a way that was sporadic and changing they lost money. They had to find things for their workers to do on the days that, say, the computer wiring guy came in to lay down his work. Money was made when one went in, worked continuously and then left. Scheduling little jobs on unknown off days on such a big job was a way to lose money for the trade workers.
So nothing was moving. I remember my husband feeling like he could not get anything done because no commitments were being made. Everyone was waiting, stalling, looking for the opportunity to grab what made them the most money. Evidently, building had become so expensive that this was how construction workers tried to work. So, it was not that there was too much to do, it was that nothing could be done. The pressure of trying to organize, and finding avoidance everywhere.
So, all the people involved in the biggest building ever built in Switzerland ( so I remember being told) were moving in their own self interest in wanting to make as much money as possible. There was no longer consideration of how things worked, only consideration for individual profit. The profit margins having become so small in the building industry that this was how one survived.
So, how did this manifest in my husband? He aged suddenly and rapidly. He was about to turn forty, but his hair in the space of six months turned grey. Liver spots ( as we call them) appeared in abundance all over his face. And the smell of him changed, he smelled more “sour”. He gained weight. His migraine headaches increased. Sometimes, I think he hanged himself to escape the headaches.
Of course, there is more to the story, as it exists in my mind. But this was the job/stress/working in the system for money side of the story as told to me by my husband.
All this stress and scrambling for profit. Survival first and foremost.
No consideration for the earth. No consideration for what is here. Just a bunch of bodies running around in fearful survival mode, programed to fear not having money and in this blind “feeding frenzy” for money, never stopping and standing up and saying “what am I doing, what are we humans doing here?”
But this is the point. Standing up and becoming a vote for an equal money system does not take life changing circumstances, one simply supports by voting for an equal money system, one supports an equal money party/system where what is here on this earth is shared by all and no longer directed by a few for profit.
This is a start. Then the programed frenzy can stop and the self can begin as all as one as equal. Then loving one’s neighbor as oneself can begin.