Taxes

This morning my son asked for information from me that I accessed through my tax forms. As I walked towards my tax folder I felt physically ill and nauseous. In December, I have to prepare my taxes for the college forms sent off with my son’s applications. Every year I avoid and procrastinate when I have to fill in these forms. Filling in all the endless forms frustrates and angers me. It all seems so insane. Our tax system is a mess of forms and regulations that are seemingly here to frustrate and frighten the tax payer. If I think about this in absolute common sense there is no fucking reason for this, and this should be obvious to any politician. Which it probably is, but a politician by their very nature want this to make themselves important, they do not care one iota about the people they stand for. This system is unnecessary. And the powers that be know this.

I have called people at the IRS many times and asked questions. One time I realized that the person on the other end was simply reading to me from a book of tax rules. This has happened many times. The people at the IRS only read the rules out, they do not understand them. And the government does not want them to understand them. It is really weird to listen to someone read and reread a manuel when one calls for information. I have actually played with this, trying to get the person on the other end to respond in some other way than simply rereading a document. They can’t do it, they either get really nervous or angry. How fucking strange.

In all the zombie movies that exist, it is not a virus that causes the single minded zombies, it is fear. The virus of mankind is FEAR. We tell ourselves over and over again that which we are. We make movies in Hollywood of what we are. Everything is displayed right in front of us and we can’t see it. There must be a point where mankind collectively realizes that there is this thing right in front of them that they have been “zombified” by and how the fuck did this happen.

I include my self. Now that I am writing this out I am releasing present anxiety.

I have done my taxes many times. Once I do them, they are not difficult.

I forgive myself for allowing and accepting my self to worry about something in the future. I forgive myself for allowing and accepting my self to become anxious about doing my taxes. I forgive myself for allowing and accepting my self to fear doing my taxes. I forgive myself for allowing and accepting my self to fear juggling what income I have. I forgive myself for allowing and accepting my self to worry about my finances. I forgive myself for allowing and accepting my self to not realize that the system is too overwhelmed and does not have the capacity to deal with all the people as it tries to uphold all it’s rules and regulations, therefor the system must hire people who really do not understand what they are doing. I forgive myself for allowing and accepting my self to fear a system that is burdened by its own bureaucracies, whereby the people within the system don’t want any problems because they themselves are frightened and avoid making decisions. I forgive myself for allowing and accepting my self to believe that I will be overwhelmed by doing my taxes. I forgive myself for allowing and accepting my self to fear doing my taxes. I forgive myself for allowing and accepting my to think about my taxes here, in November, when I am not going to do them until December. I forgive myself for allowing and accepting my self to fear doing my taxes. I forgive myself for allowing and accepting my self to become anxious about doing my taxes when I have done them many times before. I forgive myself for allowing and accepting my self to worry and become anxious about something I know how to do! I forgive myself for allowing and accepting my self to feel sorry about my self having to take care of all this paper work on my own. I forgive myself for allowing and accepting my self to wish I had someone to manage all this paper work with me. I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to believe that I need someone to manage all this paper work with me. I forgive myself for allowing and accepting my self to be proud of the fact that I have managed all this paper work alone. I forgive myself for allowing and accepting my self fear the tax system. I forgive myself for allowing and accepting my self to believe that the tax system should be feared. I forgive myself for allowing and accepting my self to be anxious about my finances. I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to believe I need fear doing my taxes.

I release all thought of doing my taxes. I eliminate, erase and disengage from all thought about the completion of my 2010 tax documents.

I am here, I breath, I am breathe, I am in this moment. I am here

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About rebeccakarlendalmas

Desteni I Process Equal Life Foundation livingincome.me eqafe.com
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